On the wall above my desk at home there is a large notice, typed by me, as a message to me, a couple of years ago.
It reads:
A Vital Message for David Harcourt
You HATE "Chinese food" purchased from the ghastly little emporium in the Wadestown village. After two mouthfuls, you feel sick. After three mouthfuls you feel as if you are about to die. After four mouthfuls, you want to die. NEVER buy "Chinese food" from the ghastly little emporium in the Wadestown village again.
Thanks to this notice, I have spared myself many weeks of illness, since I have always obeyed its injunction, no matter how hungry I might be, and how tempted to take the easy way out rather than - for half the price - prepare for myself a nourishing meal.
I have a similar notice, only this one is in my head. It reads:
Never buy food out of a bain marie.
Lately, I have been ignoring this simple, very truthful axiom, and suffering for my sins. The last two meals I have purchased from the little cafe next door to me in Molesworth Street have been selected from its bain marie and have been utterly vile. And today I purchased a meal from the bain marie in the supermarket and, although my hunger is abated, I am just about abated, too: I feel awful.
So no more bain marie food for me. Ever!
Death beckons...
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